Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Not having all the answers...

The thing about parenting is that when you are in the thick of it
you don't know which moments are the important ones.
You don't know till later, how special that particular time will be.


It might seem like you are going through a hard time,
but actually it might be about to get way worse.
You look back and wish you had known that.

Or you look back to a time
and realise that some things did get better.
It might make you sad what happened then, but eventually the pain goes away.
But when you are in the thick of it, it's impossible to know what way its going to go.

Our kids are works in progress, we are works in progress,
our families are a work in progress. It's all happening in real time,
sometimes its hard to keep up with which way is up.

The trick is to be intentional about the good times,
to stop in that moment when it's good, and stop worrying about what's next,
and take in a deep breathe and acknowledge, this is good.


The same when you are deeply deeply disappointed and your heart breaks,
you have to stop in the moment, dry your tears,
take a deep breath and say...

THIS TOO WILL PASS.

It's a process happening in real time,
we haven't seen the end yet,
we can't look back because we are in it.

This is what parenting teens is all about.

15 comments:

  1. You are very wise!! I appreciate you sharing this. Makes me feel silly being frustrated with my two.

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  2. thanks Deb, for sharing your wisdom, and 'reality', take care x

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  3. know what ya saying dear Deb. Hugs

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  4. Oh Deb! Wanting to give you the biggest and snuggliest of hugs! Stick in there.

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  5. I am going to reread this post over and over again during the years to come Deb - you are amazing and wise xx
    And gorgeous in the last photo!!

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  6. As one who survived the teen years.....you do somehow get through....god knows how sometimes, but you do.
    as I described it, it's a mad roller coaster ride, there is lots of screaming, some fear, lots of laughter....but if you maintain a sense of humour and learn forgiveness..no one will fall out of the carriage!

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  7. We have to grow with our teenagers don't we Deb. Its a learning curve for both of us and yes, we have to make the most of everyday and take the good out of it.
    I do love that photo of you and James. A real treasure

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  8. Love to you Deb.
    I only pop in from time to time, but I know exactly what you're talking about.
    It's bloody hard sometimes.
    So thank you very much for this post.

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  9. Very wise words Deb!!!Wish you alot of happy moments together.

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  10. I'm with the others... Saving this to read again in ten years xxx

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  11. My eldest is nearly 23, and she was the hardest of my kids to raise. A wonderful kid, but oh my gosh--sometimes I swear her head spun on her neck and she spoke in tongues. Not in a good way. Now we have so much fun together and I think--this is the reward a parent gets for not eating her young. Now I just need to remember that with my hormonal 19 year old twins. God bless!

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  12. At the moment I'm on the other side of the coin
    Therefore

    The same when you are deeply deeply disappointed and your heart breaks,
    you have to stop in the moment, dry your tears,
    take a deep breath and say...

    THIS TOO WILL PASS.

    It's a process happening in real time,
    we haven't seen the end yet,
    we can't look back because we are in it.

    This is what being a child is all about and you wish the adults played fair . . .

    From one heart broken girl to another HUGE hugs
    I love you xxx

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  13. Oh I so needed to read that right now :)) Beautiful photos by the way....love the ones of both of you together :)) xxx

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  14. Big big hugs to you xxx I always want to have a tanty when life seems impossibly hard and unfair and said and and... which is alot of the time... :( It will pass - thinking of you x

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