Yesterday morning I woke up very early and lay in bed trying to figure out why I was feeling upset about David's big day. It made no sense to me because I'm happy that he has a new person and even happier that they were getting married. Just because I didn't want to be married to him anymore, doesn't mean that I wanted him to be unhappy.
I worked out what was upsetting me, and it's a bit silly really. It is because now there is a new Mrs Robertson and she is the step-mum to my kids. They have step-siblings now and a whole bunch of new people in their lives. I know that I've been very easily replaced in David's life and I guess I was subconsciously concerned that the kids would find me just as easy to replace.
My rational self knows that is not the case. I'm mum and I always will be. And Rhonda is a really important person in their lives and I want them to get to know her, to like her and to respect her; if for no other reason, because their dad loves her.
Rhonda and I, while not friends, can respect each other's place in the children's lives and we can communicate with each other to this end.
I think it is ok to feel a bit sad at this change of things.
I won't lie. I shed tears. It's just so hard to have your kids involved in something so big and you can't be there. But they all did really well and according to all accounts the day went off perfectly. And if my heart hurts a little, don't worry. I'll get over myself I'm sure.