Tuesday, May 23, 2017

a change in relationship status

My Facebook friends noticed that I recently changed my relationship status. I figured to write about this because, well it's what I do. So first up. 

Yay for Tinder. Yes almost a year ago I swiped right or left or whatever it is, and so did he. Amazing isn't it? Such a simple thing, like two ships passing in the night and flashing their lights at each other. Since then we have been slowly getting to know each other. It takes time but slow is good.

I'll call him Mr W. He's from Liverpool.
He's been in New Zealand for a long time. He's a Carpenter/Joiner.
He cooks a mean lasagna, likes to swim and loves music.
Has two grown up boys and likes watching old UK tv comedies
(he introduced Annie to Fawlty Towers)

There's a lot of frogs before you find a prince on Tinder. Sheesh. But he had a nice photo and I'd messaged him a bit. I messaged my folks to tell them I was going to meet him because I just had a feeling that Mr W. was going to be someone important. Turns out he is, very important.

So has it all been sunshine and roses? No. Hell no. Life is messy and complicated. Life is hard and life throws challenges at you like you would not believe. 

One of the things I really struggle with, is to see myself as someone worth loving. There's voices in my head that remind me that I'm unloveable, but most of the time I tell them to shut up. It's a constant struggle you know, between believing I'm worth it and knowing I'm not. I'm working on it. We are all flawed human beings you know. None of us are perfect, we are all works in progress.

So yeah, it's been hard. I think that's the hardest thing second time round, to trust someone else enough to let them get to know you. When you open yourself to someone else it gives them the possibility to really see you as you are. Of course the more that you let someone in, the more chance there is of it ending in hurt. But you can't live like that. Well I can't.

So I choose to be vulnerable, I choose to be open, I choose to trust. What have I got to lose?

I don't know what the future holds. None of us do. But I'm really enjoying learning to share it with someone kind, dependable and stable. Someone who makes me want to do better, someone who takes the time to listen. It's a good thing. 

And through it all he offers me protection
A lot of love and affection
Whether I'm right or wrong
And down the waterfall
Wherever it may take me
I know that life won't break me...


  1. Woohoo! This is lovely news Deb :-) As s fellow ardent believer in love I am so glad you met Mr W and that he's kind and dependable because oh my goodness Deb YOU ARE SO WORTH IT!!!!! Xxxxxxxx

  2. So happy for you because you are worth it . You are such a lovely warm, intelligent, handsome and a lot more woman. Believe in yourself please do!!!!!!!!
    Hugs from Baukje in France

  3. Bravo Deb! We are meant to connect, even though it can be hard.

  4. So pleased to hear this. You deserve every happiness ☺. I loved faulty towers too.xx

  5. This is most excellent news! You have every right to be loved and love in return.

  6. Congrats on finding a good friend ! May I say to you that I think LOVE is a gift and so a gift is not worked for nor deserved by anything we dont do or do, it is just a gift we either receive it or we dont! In any case I hope you will be happy and filled with joy with your gift!!

  7. Aw so good, you are an inspiration to me!!


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