Wednesday, October 4, 2017

I sewed my hopes and dreams for this summer into this bright hopeful quilt.


This will be the third summer that I've been single parenting. The first summer went by in a blur. I went to New York which was amazing and somehow got up the courage to sell my house and buy a better one. The second summer also went by in a blur. Although we had two wonderful weeks at the cousin's place at Lake Opua, the rest of it was pretty average.


And now I am planning for the third summer. I've untangled my feelings and realised that my long standing marriage to David finally unravelled over the course of a summer, ending after we came back from our camping holiday. Isn't it weird how things that happened in the past, effect how we feel about the future? actually I suppose not weird, but anyway I'm glad I figured it out before we lost too many more summers.


So now I am reclaiming summer. I'm moving on from all the complicated feelings about the downright awkwardness of that last summer and I have started collecting up camping gear. I have washed all the things I have and worked out what I need. I have booked a site for November to try out the whole process by myself and to see if we can do it. We have down scaled all the things we need to the bare necessities. I think it will work.



I made this bright quilt. I planned it weeks ago in the depths of the winter. I plan to use this quilt every single week this summer. I want us to spread it out on the beach, under trees, on river banks and on sunny decks. I want us to lie on it reading, eat picnics on it and probably (in all honesty) wrap shivering wet children in it to go home after an outing by the water. I want to look back at all the photos of the summer and see glimpses of this quilt. And then whenever I see this quilt in the future I want to remember that I had a magical summer with the kids enjoying each other's company and the outdoors.


There are some pretty substantial flaws in this plan. The first is that our budget is too small to do any extra stuff, but on the upside the things we are thinking about are mostly free. The second is that the Resident Teen is pretty much attached to his bedroom, his PlayStation and all his home comforts and it is going to be Tricky with a capital T to get him out enjoying the outdoors. I'm not sure how to accomplish this, but I AM DETERMINED to have some family time before he flies the nest and doesn't want to spend any time with us at all.


The reality is that I probably won't actually succeed all the time in bringing the Resident Teen to the Great Outdoors to spend quality time in the Fresh Air with his Mother and Little Sister. The reality is that mostly Annie and I will probably drag the quilt across the road to the park to eat our dinner and kick a ball around. But even so, I am hoping and hoping and hoping that I can make a really happy fun summer, especially for Annie with my limited resources and that in spite of everything, the three of us make some good memories to carry us through the next year.

10 comments:

  1. I hope you have a wonderful summer and that this quilt is filled with love and great memories!

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  2. The quilt is so nice! I love the plans you have for it.

    When my kids were teenagers it helped to let them bring a friend along on outings. But yeah. The gaining autonomy thing hurts a little.

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  3. Oh teenagers..........where to put them through this phase??? In a cupboard? Perhaps under a quilt? I'm sure Dr Seuss would know? Here's to a happy memorable summer no matter the out come or where to spend it!

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  4. Deb I adore this quilty plan - makes me think about the sisterhood of the travelling pants :-) I believe, with all that fabulous colour and love stitched into this quilt, that it will be a powerful force that will constantly catch your eye, lift your spirits and make you dance out into the beautiful world. It will also snuggle and comfort you on rainy days. Oh yes! This is SUCH a good quilt. I can feel it! And you are such a powerful and passionate woman I know you can do anything :-) xxxxx

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  6. Deb you are such an insightful person. It appears you think about things for a long time and then figure it out. Instead of letting the past define you, you are letting it help decide what kind of future you want. I hope this summer is full of opportunities to make sweet memories.

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  7. Sounds like a great plan! How can you not feel happy looking at that quilt!

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  8. Jolly good goals. I have a very similar resident teen - you want them participating and happy with it, not dragging someone grumpy along. A skill I have not yet mastered!

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  9. Great Coin Quilt. Love all the bright colours and your hopes for a happy summer. Hope the weather turns up trumps too.

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